You are the epitome of all my dreams; A knowing, a remembering, an Essence?You are all joy and wonder and comfort, Yet, you bring discomfort,HORRIBLE! beyond the wildest imaginings Are you to behold,Yet, I have beheld you - and you are WONDERFUL! All semblance of Reality, torn asunder, GONE!You shattered my very Soul, or merged it, not sure. With the Remembering, I am Whole.I AM you, you ARE me -- a Part. I was here, yet I was there and you were there -WHERE? WHEN? In a place that is not a place, nowhen?I felt awe and curiosity, And you were unknown - Yet I knew you - With a different kind of Knowing:As a part of me that is not the same Yet is the same. Who? - or WHAT you are, I know not.You WERE and you WILL BE or -- No. YOU ARE!You seem Absolute Chaos to outward senses, Yet, you are Total Order to the dark recesses of my mind.Yes/No. Is/Isn't. Open/Closed. More like: FOLDING AND UNFOLDING. But - Like a Vortex here, but, in noplace/nowhen, a THING. A Force? Not a God, not a Being. You do not Think. You simply ARE.I SEE you, in the in-between of every thing that exists; Hidden, forming, devouring, all in One NOW. Yet - I AM YOU!Of all, I absolutely KNOW: That you bring - or take THAT,Which None Other Can.LOVE. Beyond love.
Not emotion. Not thought. Not tangible.LOVE. NYA-RAL-YAT! NYARAYAT. Yes: WILL!
(I wrote this based on a
recurring experience that solidified as a "visible," crystal-clear
"thing" in 1958. I was too young to find any vocabulary to put it to
words, save "the in/out," "the IT," "where I came
from," and at age 3, "wanna go home," thinking I could get into
"it" where two walls and floor intersected into a point, taking
kitchen knives and trying to "get there" and wrecking the plaster.
Certain music brought "it" closer. It clarified completely when I was
7. An English teacher thought it to be a religious experience and a physics
professor friend puzzled over it and wanted a copy. I know exactly what I was
seeing - one might call the the effect of a cosmic "Bang/Crunch" and
I can at least prove mathematically that this "INFINITE" is indeed
infused into what is here and finite.)
(Someone
tell the English teacher "god's name begins with an S." I probably
got Nyaralyat - which I though I made up - from hearing the
"Narayana" or even "Charnaya.")